eto zasto nas upropascavanju.
imaju prirucnik za to.


Prirucnik za upropašcivanje muškarca, u 40 koraka :
(100% efikasan)

1. Udati se za njega
2. Obavezno mu reci da vam on nije ni prvi ni stoti
3. Napravite ljubomornu scenu kad za to nema ama baš nikakvog povoda
4. Ostanite potpuno hladni ako imate razloga za ljubomoru
5. Kad god mu je do seksa - odbijte ga
6. Kad mu nije do seksa - navalite na njega
7. Sve pare koje mu izvucete obavezno odmah potrošite na gluposti
8. Kad s njim obilazite radnje, trudite se da kupovina traje što duže
9. Zvocajte mu stalno kako malo zaraduje
10. Non-stop mu pricajte kako su svi njegovi prijatelji uspešniji od njega
11. Njegove prijatelje koji su zaista manje uspešni rasterajte
12. Kad ste sami s njim, trudite se da izgledate kao cudovište
13. Budite boginja, ako je tu još neko osim muža
14. Rodite mu samo jedno dete, dovoljno je
15. Ime deteta je važno. Gledajte da bude po nekome iz vaše familije.
16. Ne zaboravite - mama je vaš najbolji prijatelj
17. Pitajte ga šta želi za nedeljni rucak, pa kad se odluci, spremite nešto drugo
18. Nemojte se smejati kad je on raspoložen, složite neku nadrndanu facu
19. Ako je neraspoložen, onda zalepite na lice osmeh od uha do uha
20. Uvek govorite kako mu noge smrde, narocito pred trecim licima
21. Ako ste domacica, ništa od vas. Morate raditi i to na takvom radnom mestu gdje se ne zna precizno radno vreme
22. Organizujte mu vrlo ceste fizicke aktivnosti u vidu pomeranja nameštaj po kuci, a ako odbije poslušnost, prenesite sami samo jednu stolicu, pa se na sav glas žalite prijateljicama kako ste se zbog njega iskilavili
23. Cim se u kuci nešto pokvari, ne cekajte da on popravi, vec zovite majstora
24. Kad vam se omakne da uradite ili kažete neku ocitu glupost, mazite se oko njega, pa mu tepajte i umiljavajte se, recite mu maznim glasom - "ja sam tvoja mala slatka lutkica".
25. Budite veoma strogi prema svim njegovim pogrešnim potezima, a ako baš i niste neko zlopamtilo, to zapišite pred njim u svešcicu
26. U istu svešcicu obavezno napišite sve što on u bunilu obeca, pa onda svakog dana vadite svešcicu i govorite "Evo, ovde je nešto zapisano..."
27. Obecajte mu sve što vam padne na pamet, ali ni u ludilu to ne ispunjavajte
28. Držite ga za novcanik i rec, a ne za k...
29. Usisivac koristite iskljucivo kad on gleda sport na TV-u
30. Koristite pred njim cesto uzrecice kao što su - "A što li sam ja Bogu zgrešila..."
31. Ponekad budite i divni pa mu ugadajte, ali ne više od jednom mesecno
32. Morate imati neke tajne koje mu nikad necete otkriti. Neka te tajne iz vas zrace i cine da se on oseca neugodno.
33. Uvek mu prepricavajte do besvesti sve one bezvezne detalje s posla
34. Ne dozvolite da vas davi svojim poslom i te pokušaje u startu stopirajte
35. Ako mu se mama zove npr. Vera, uvek joj se obracajte sa "Tetka Vera"
36. S vremena na vreme placite pred njim bez razloga (da ga iznervirate)
37. Svoju platu trošite samo na sebe i to iskljucivo na kozmetiku i garderobu
38. Dok je dete malo, uvaljujte ga njegovim roditeljima na cuvanje, a kad odraste, onda ga iskljucivo šaljite kod vaše mame i govorite da ga njegova ne ume vaspitavati
39. Imajte u vidu da je dobar razvod bolji nego loš brak, ali tek pošto nadete novu žrtvu
40. (VAZNO!) - Ovaj pravilnik ne primjenjujte ako vam je muž sirovina, jer možete dobiti batine. Ali, šta bi pametna žena poput vas radila sa sirovinom?

Moja zena ovo ima odstampano! Nije mi priznala, ali mislim da je nabavila i dodatak kako modelaru smuciti odlazak na livadu i kako deci dodati u ruke model, a da krivica ne padne na nju...

Zadaci iz matematike u skolama u Zemunu...
lol

Ovo moze biti poucno!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WggONYsUBKg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=--F8_JZvpyc

voznja bez zuba...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHX2mvFVQMs&feature=player_embedded

dal cupko moze ovo?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hu66V5dTZVI

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SgTKU1akMzE&NR=1


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s5C5Zk4kobo

http://picasaweb.google.hu/szantaigyozo/2010Indoor#5431129891445463362


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbtUDwq_dYU

Ovo je stvarno pizza box  ")
Jeli leti sa pizzom ili bez?  mmmm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aXo-Wmpla0&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MKuA6VS_ujw&feature=related

Sta je original Bosanac u Kanadi ili Wisconsin Winter Wonderland?

Wisconsin Winter Wonderland:
http://www.ed-cindy.com/gpage.html
   
DIARY OF A SNOW SHOVELER
   

December 8: 6:00 PM. It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9: We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the Whole World? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had. Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life.

December 12: The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment. My neighbor tells me not to worry; we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice man. I'm glad he's our neighbor.

December 14: Snow, lovely snow! 8" last night. The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so.

December 15: 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.

December 16: Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour, which I think was very cruel.

December 17: Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.

December 20: Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of the damn stuff last night. More shoveling. Took all day. Damn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22: Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt till August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. By the time I got undressed, pissed and dressed again. I was too tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter; but he says he's too busy. I think the asshole is lying.

December 23: Only 2" of snow today. And it warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she...nuts??? Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's damn well lying.

December 24: 6". Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, but I was busy watching for the damn snowplow.

December 25: Merry Christmas. 20 more inches of the !=3D@x@!x!x1 slop tonight. Snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. God I hate the snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" one more time, I'm going to kill her.

December 26: Still snowed in. Why the hell did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.

December 27: Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes froze.

December 28: Warmed up to above -50. Still snowed in. THE WOMAN is driving me crazy!!!

December 29: 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30: Roof caved in. The snow plow driver is suing me for a million dollars for the bump on his head. The wife went home to her mother. 9" predicted.

December 31: Set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.

January 8: I feel so good. I just love those little white pills they keep giving me.

Why am I tied to the bed?

Mujo: Haso znaš li ti možda čemu služi propeler na motoru kod aviona?
Haso: Pa otkud ja znam. Možda za letit.
Mujo: Ma ne to ti služi da se pilot ne znoji.
Haso: Ma daj nema ti to veze s pilotom.
Mujo: Ma šta nema, budeš vidio kako bi se pilot počeo znojit kad bi se prestao vrtit.

Tri rode lete zajedno i pitaju jedna drugu:
-Gdje letis????
Ova odgovori:
-Danas cu obradovati jednan bracni par sto vec 10 godina pokusava imati djecu... Evo,.... njima nosim jednu prelijepu bebicu.
-Bas lijepo, rece roda sto je pitala i sama nastavlja:
-Ja idem kod jedne zene koja nikada nije imala djecu.... evo nosim joj jednog sincica... a druga dodaje:
-Ne sumnjam da ces je uciniti veoma sretnom.
Sada ove dvije rode pitaju trecu:
-A ti,....... gdje ti ides?
-Ja??...... Ja idem u samostan kod casnih sestara.......Nikada im nista ne nosim al se svaki put useru!   :hehe